Day Thirty-One! Meta-maniac.

I got a question for you. Can you pull fat? I know you can pull a muscle and a tendon and a ligament. Heck you can strain 'em, sprain 'em, and tear 'em, but what I really want to know is; Can you pull fat? I'm asking because after my little 'performance' yesterday (I'm going to keep reminding you that this is a performance - yeah thanks for that, Tracy!) my love handles are crying uncle! No kidding. Maybe I've just been a cream-puff for too long, but that's all changing isn't it?


Here we are on the last day of March. I realized as I looked at the calendar that both the months of February and March have been dedicated to the Method. In the month of March alone, I've done 27 Transform workouts and..... brace yourselves, actually you might want to be sitting if you're not already.... 24 Cardio workouts. Can you believe that?! Holy crap. I just might get that "bikini body by summer" that all the fitness magazines promise.

If I weren't doing Boot Camp or the Metamorphosis program, I'd still be working out. Shut up! I would be. It would just be more like 12 or 14 times in the last month and certainly would not have included cardio. So, if you're looking at my mid-morph body photos from day 19 and wondering how I did it. That's how. That and the Dynamic Eating Plan. Good times!

So on another note that is almost entirely off topic but I cannot think of a good segue....


I dreamed of Cher last night. I can't remember the whole dream, but she was prancing around in all her Diva glory and we were having some kind of silly conversation. Nothing deep or meaningful that I could take away as a "sign" or a "message". I'm not that crazy. Like I've told you before, I'm just like a crazy person, only more so. Hmm wait a minute I guess that is crazy. Nevermind.

I'm not sure what spurred on the reemergence of my fascination with her as of late, I mean I've always been a fan. In any case, I've been reading about her life and her achievements and she's just so sassy and brazen and unapologetic. I simply cannot get enough.

Were you aware that she got her first Academy Award Nomination for Silkwood at the age of 37? The woman didn't get a leading role in a film until she was 39, (that's my age - at least for a few more months, shit I'd better get my act together) when she made the film Mask.


Now you might be wondering what any of this has to do with the Method. Are you waiting for me to tell you that Cher does the Method or works out with Badass Anderson or something? Hell if I know. But there is a correlation. Cher never let anything stop her. Not the break-up of a marriage, not bad reviews or lousy press, not age, nothing. She did what she wanted to do and she did it how she wanted to do it and dare I say the woman does it with flare! As a chick in the middle of a midlife crisis, I am at a cross-roads. Not sure what to do with my life. Taking stock of my choices up to now. And I'm looking for role models, people who have done what I want to do and were successful at it against the odds. Cher is one such person.


If she can start a film career in her late 30's, bloody hell, I should be able to handle a new fitness routine, right? And hey, if I keep at it, at least one of my screenplays will finally turn into an award winning film. (God.... it's me, Shan, are you listening?) And when it does, I am going to look super-fly on the red carpet, mama! Yeah, yeah, I realize no one says super-fly anymore, but it's one of the ones I'm bringing back, just watch me.


Anyhoo - that's enough prattling on. I read a quote from the Diva herself. She said: "Until you're ready to look foolish, you'll never have the possibility of being great." Well! If looking foolish is the yard stick, then when I am doing the Method, I am well on my way to greatness. Alexander, you'd better watch it buddy, I'm coming for your title!


And if this ain't a butterfly in all her grandeur and glory, I'm afraid I don't know what is my friends!! Here's to all our Metamorphosis's. You know what I mean.

Cheers.
Shan

Day Thirty - Metamorphosis

It's Meta-Mania. We're doing it! A month in and I still can't quite believe that I'm still here. I almost didn't make it today. It was a crazy busy day with a boatload of obligations, writing deadlines, not to mention my 90 minutes in the kitchen because of food-prep day for my Nutrient Boost week. Week five. Whew. And I gotta make this quick because I have my veggie chili on the stove as I type. It's all happening.


This experience is going to be different for everyone. Hell, it's different for me from day to day. We have ups and downs, or as I like to call them love days and hate days, but we keep showing up and as we do, we learn a little bit more about ourselves and each other, our little community continues to grow and we get stronger. I must preface tonight's post by saying I have grown very fond of many of you. I feel a bond developing with you and I wish that I could meet each and everyone of you in person, preferably at a Starbucks because I luv me my Starbucks, and thank you, hug you and tell you how much you've come to mean to me and how great I think you're all doing. I'm impressed and it takes a lot to impress me.

And speaking of stronger....


I did manage to make it to the mat in the end. Round about four o'clock I knew if I didn't just do it, it wasn't gonna happen and I really wanted to put my tick marks on my workout tracker. But I didn't want to just get it over with, I really wanted to be present and make an effort. And here's the coolest part, I kicked level three's ass! Oh yesirree. I got in there and really gave it a lot of power, even the arms were flowing today. I didn't get lost or confused and the more I focused on using the muscles, the stronger I felt, and more energy came. By the time I dropped to the floor to do the legs, I was on fire (in a good way). I did my 40 reps and had energy for more. Once finished, I got onto my cherished little trampoline and jumped for all I was worth. I went harder and higher, faster and longer. I almost had fun. I said almost people, let's not go crazy here.


Once I was through, I cooled down with some of my favorite yoga poses and it was good. I'm really looking forward to having my chunkie-veggie chili for dinner tonight. I'm starving, especially after reading Marcia's blog. But...For right now, I'm grateful for level three. I heard that level four has a lot of planks in it which I am dreading a 'lil bit, so I'll just be happy with where I'm at. There is something very cool about having this process, this routine - when the rest of my life is swirling about chaotically - the Method is like an oak tree in a storm.

Oooooooh, I also wanted to tell you that I have a brand new idol. Well actually she's an old idol of mine, in fact I had a barbie doll of her when I was a little kid. It's Cher - circa 1975. Lordissa she's glorious and so freakin' cool. 

For some reason I'm just obsessed with her at the moment, so my motto this week, is "How would Cher do it?" and I'm gonna do it like that all week long! 


Peace!

Day Twenty-Nine - Stretching the Wings

Well, I have nearly a month under my belt on the Metamorphosis program and it's starting to feel like part of my normal everyday routine. Although, I will confess that this morning I was moaning a little bit about having only one day off. Looking ahead to six straight days of working out when you're on day one can be slightly overwhelming, but we don't have to do it all at once.

A little bit each day. One day at a time. Is this a support group or what? BAA. Badass Anderson Anonymous. Wasn't there someone out there who was going to start a blog as soon as they had a title. Well there you go, you have my permission to use that if you want it. We've got to support one another, there's just no other way to get through this. I promise you that if I wasn't blogging about the Method I would have dropped out ages ago.

So has anyone seen the video of Tracy working out with Nicole Richie yet? Near the end of the video a couple of Tracy's trainers join in and the four of them look as though they are having so much fun. Perhaps this dance cardio wouldn't be so bad if I had the space to really let it fly. Then a few of us could get together and we could really ham it up. How cool would that be? But that's not the case at the moment. I have a tiny space and I'm dancing all by my onezie. (Truthfully that's probably better for all involved, no one wants to see me dance.)

Nicole mentioned how much she loved the cardio and quite honestly I wanted to smack her! But that's just me.

This week is going to be a bit more challenging as my work load is doubled and I haven't prepped my meals yet. I thought I was ready to go last night with the nutrient boost but realized this morning that I don't have any apples or blueberries. Duh, totally blanked on that one. So today will be healthy lean eating and the following six days will be back to the Nutrient Boost.

Haven't had any really good confessions on here lately, I mean apart from the cake on the weekend, but it was a birthday and all so that didn't feel so bad. But here's the thing. I have been super faithful to my muscular structure workouts, vomit inducing as they might be (actually this morning wasn't too bad, I only felt slightly ill) but I have been a total slacker on the cardio. Like total, okay? I mean to tell you that I've been doing it on my rebounder  all week. I didn't get one single dance routine in on the floor, and I haven't been putting too much effort into the bouncing that I do do. If I was a rapper they'd call me Lay-Zee.You feel me?

So, even though the proverbial plate's a bit full, I am going to publicly commit to learning a new dance routine. I don't think it will be the one that Tracy posted for Franco Valiente around Christmas, because although she posted it as an "easy" routine, I found it anything but easy. I do have her other cardio workouts and there are a handful still left to master, so that's the goal for this week. Learn a new dance. You heard it here. If anyone else is up for this little challenge, I'd be grateful for the company. You know, just to keep us on our toes, quite literally, and up our game a little bit. We're nearly a third of the way through the program. Mustn't become complacent, right?

If anyone else has a challenge that they'd like to share, shoot it over and let's get it done!


Lay-Zee signing off. 

Twenty-eight Days Later!

Hey, isn't 28 Days Later a horror movie? Need I say more? I should really just finish the post there. But I wouldn't want you to think that the Badass Anderson Zombies got the better of me.

There is a war going on, no doubt about that. Me ole love handles are really putting up a fight. I do not know what it is about Level Three, but it's having an effect on me. When I was doing the workout this weekend, I literally threw up a little bit in my mouth. Gross I know, over-sharing - probably, but I am really very curious about this physical reaction I'm having to it. Some believe that the body holds memories. The pain and struggles that were absorbed rather than let go. I've had many a yoga student break down during class because a certain posture released some deep seated emotion or trauma. I wonder what my muffin top will reveal to me by the end of the program? Ooooo, sounds so mysterious, doesn't it? But I bet you there's some gravity to it because it's really hanging on. Last week I saw inches lost in my chest, hips and thighs but nothing around my waist.

Often when children are afraid or worried, they will sort of wrap their arms around themselves, covering up their tummies. You'll see many a teenager walking through the malls and arcades with their shoulders hunched up as if trying to hide their midsection. The navel and solar plexus are natural areas of both power and vulnerability which makes me think that we abcentrics share more than weight-gain patterns. I agree that some of it is genetic but is that all it is? I find through the comments on here and on the forum many of us have more than our body shapes in common. Perhaps there are other reasons for holding weight around our middle. We've found that it gives us a buffer against a sometimes harsh world. Or maybe we feel protected with the barrier around us? What I do know for sure is that I don't have the answer but I am curious about it.

Today is a rest day for which I am grateful, but I've still got six more days with Level 3 so I will be sure to keep an eye on my body's responses. Will I lose weight from the area? Will I continue to feel sick each time I do it? Maybe it's all as simple as I haven't been following the diet as closely this week and some of the junk I have consumed over my beloved's birthday weekend are playing a role and it's nothing more than that.

As for tomorrow, it's week five for me and that's a nutrient boost week. I am not entirely ready to let go of Tracy's nutrition plan quite yet, so I am going to make a couple of adjustments to it, but will for the most part follow it. The menu includes Turkey Spinach Crumble which I am going to change into Veggie Chili instead, and I just can't bring myself to do the Roasted Veggie Puree - those vegetables for me are gag-inducing normally, if they are whipped into mush, there will be no way to not toss my cookies on the mat! So I'll substitute crudites there. As for the Gazpacho - again it will be a fresh salad with all the same ingredients, but I plan also to add avocado and feta to fatten it up a little bit and keep my calories up. Everything else will remain the same - the Juice, Apple Sauce and Pudding. I'm sort of looking forward to it. These nutrient boost weeks are super hard, but I feel like they get me back on track and help control the sugar cravings.

Life beyond the Metamorphosis has been a little bit crazy, life in the Arts often is, so it will be nice to settle into a week where the menu is set, the workout is there and I can do both without having to think too much about it. I hope you're all coming along well with your programs. I heard about a few ups and downs this week involving tequila shots or grilled cheese sandwiches, even bowls of ice cream with chocolate sauce. I'm here to remind you that it's not never falling down that matters, it's what you do after the fall. Do you let your slip ups keep you down? Or do you pick yourself up and carry on?


For those of you just starting your journey on the Method, I hope you'll stop in, rest a while or say hello. Everyone's welcome, the glutie girls, the hippie chicks, the omni peeps and of course my ab-sisters.

Cheers.
Shan

Twenty-Six - Metamorphosis

Hey guys.

I was just on the forum and saw that someone had hit something like 37 days. I was amazed thinking wow, she's been at this for some time and wanted to congratulate her. Looking at my own calendar I see I'm not all that far behind. There are a few of you who are ahead of me, like Victoria, your day count must be getting up there too. Those of you who are in boot camp at the moment or who are on the Metamorphosis program, even if you're just starting, I'd like to ask you to stop and take a moment to consider what you've accomplished so far. Most of us are hoping to achieve with Tracy what we've failed to do with other fitness programs or on our own. Seriously, take a second to pat yourself on the back, to thank your body for all the good work it's doing, we're all doing a good job. Way to go my method fam.


Decided to shake things up a little bit today. I could have gotten up this morning and rolled straight onto the mat like I've done everyday for nearly the past month, but I made a conscious decision not to. I don't want to find myself being an inflexible slave to a system that I've set up because I don't want to feel like a captive of my own prison. It's Saturday. I have the day off. I can work out later. Plus, I have a wee bit of a sugar hangover. 


Yesterday, there was cake. A lotta cake. And I don't feel one bit guilty about it. I did really well with food choices during the day yesterday and for dinner - as completely unbelievable as it is, I practiced some portion control. I basically halfed my portions of protein and starch and doubled up on the steamed veggies, so my plate still looked full but my belly didn't hurt afterward. That was a first and it was pretty freakin' cool! And then I had TWO SERVINGS of chocolate cake WITH ICE CREAM - and it was good! So to all of you who have been encouraging me to try portion control or not beat myself up, this post is for you. I am deeply grateful for your insight and contributions.


I don't want to be over-confident. If this is our Everest, we're still sitting pretty at base camp and there's a long way to go before we reach the top.


The funny thing is though, that now that I haven't done it in a while, I can feel the effects of the sugar. It's like when you quit smoking. While you smoke you have no idea that you can no longer smell or taste anything or that the nagging constant cough isn't normal until you give up the cigs, then wow - a whole new world opens up. Tracy is opening up a whole new world of food for us. I even voluntarily had her kiwi-dessert recipe for breakfast this morning. Utterly shocking! I'm eating like a normal person - one without food obsessions and issues. I'm fascinated by it all at the moment.


That doesn't necessarily mean that later today I won't want to tuck into the rest of that birthday cake or struggle with eating too much in the future, I'm new to all of this so I expect to screw it up. I'm just taking notice of a small goal achieved. The wonderful thing about being able to share this process with so many people going through it too is that we can be a witness for one another. Keep each other accountable and remind ourselves how capable we truly are.


Weather it's the diet, the muscular structure routines or the cardio - we're going to hit rough weather, but moving through it to the other side means little victories. These challenges and celebrations would simply not exist if we weren't committed to doing this. It's adding so much to my life that wasn't there before. Not only is it trimming my physique, it's added another dimension to my experience and given me this whole beautiful community of people whom I never would have met.


Who knew an exercise program could do all that? Damn people, looks like we've got ourselves a love day! Or it could just be all the sugar talking. Either way have a terrific weekend.

Shan

Twenty Five Already?

Holy cow, the past twenty-five days have flown by. I must pay attention or it will all be over and I'll wonder where it went. As hard as this is, I do love a good process. Nuts, I know. I get that a lot.

So I don't know what it's like where you are today, but we are in full spring mode out here on the West Coast and with that comes spring fever and the desire to have fun, take it easy, cruise into the weekend and the good times. Plus it's my beloved's birthday weekend and you know what that means?? CAKE! Wooooooooooo! I luv me some cake. Wow, need to get a bit of a grip there.

A more-sane committed individual might say to herself, Shan, there's going to be cake tonight and you'll be dining in a restaurant so there will likely be wine and other naughty things too. You might want to think about going the extra mile on your workout today, no? Puh-leeeze. Have I ever given you the impression that I'm a sane person. I'm like a crazy person only more so.

I didn't want to work out. I wanted to go out. I felt like getting some new shoes. Which of course I can't because I'm not only on a diet and exercise program I am also trying desperately to become a frugalista. (Your blog didn't bloody help that along too much did it, Andi? All those clothes and shoes and pretty things.) 

My trick all along has been bribery. I sometimes beg and bully myself to get my butt onto the mat, but usually bribery works best. So I told myself that if I did my muscular structure, I could ....put off.... my cardio until later in the day. (Whatever, don't judge me I did what I had to do) 

Do you remember me telling you yesterday that level three's workout is so hard it made me sick? It's a bit like giving birth I think. You suffer through it and then the baby's born and you forget all about it. It's like your memory's been wiped clean. Evidently that's what happened because I got going on the workout and I'm thinking this isn't too bad. Except of course that I look like a total weirdo doing these arm movements. But then it's time for the legs. I get on all fours and I pause the dvd because for the life of me I cannot remember the first exercise. That's strange. I search my mind for any hint. Nope. Not a chance. I literally have no idea. Oh goody, it's going to be a surprise and I am in the early stages of dementia. Isn't aging fun?

I resume play and she tells me to put my right foot on the outside of my right hand and then it all comes flooding back - even the sick feeling. I don't want to do this?! 

I beg, I plead, but the voice in my head reminds me that I don't have to do cardio..... until later. I sucked it up and managed to get to the end but by that time I had such a sweat on that I was gonna have to take a shower anyway. May as well get the cardio out of the way while I was at it. Sneaky ass little voice in my head! 

I did it, but I didn't like it and just to illustrate my defiance, I free-styled almost the whole way through. Yeah, like Tracy's gonna care!

Once it was all said and done, I was glad that I'd done it so I'll be free to go on and have some cake tonight. But I got to thinking, what can I possibly write about that might inspire anybody else who's feeling this way today, because frankly writing -  do it, you'll feel better ain't gonna cut it when you're in that mood. I got to thinking. Motivation. Where does it come from? Then my head went back to shoes, the lovely shoes that I'll not get to shop for, which then led me to Jennifer Lopez. How'd I make that leap? Well...

I am not a huge fan of Jenny from the block, but she's got one song that I guarantee you will stick in your head and have you tapping a toe by the end. If you don't know it, it starts out kinda so so - but watch to the end - you might be glad you did. And if it doesn't get your groove on, it will mos def get you in the mood for new shoes.

Enjoy.

Last thing, let's all be grateful that our cardio is not choreographed by Jay Lo, shall we? I betcha we could totally do these moves, ladies. 

Have a great weekend.
Shan

Day Twenty-Four - Up Our Game

If we were sitting together over a cup of coffee, at Starbucks say, hmmm I love Starbucks, I'd ask you to close your eyes and imagine what I was about to tell you. But since Starbucks is not allowed and we are not in the same room and you can't close your eyes because then you wouldn't be able to read this, I'll just keep it simple and say imagine the following.

A cold harsh landscape with craggy rock outcroppings, steep hills and not a tree in sight. Then imagine movement at the crest of a hill on the horizon. It's a figure on a horse. As the figure rides closer, you can just make out billowing locks of golden hair flying in the wind. As the woman rider comes into focus, you can now see that it's Badass Anderson. She's Viking-esque with a metallic bustier and a studded leather mini with knee-high ass-kicking boots on. But what catches your attention is the glittery sword strapped to her side. As she pulls her horse up to a halt, whips out the sword and it glistens brightly in the daylight, she brandishes it like a warrior princess and as you look closely, you can see an inscription on the blade. It says.....


Muffin-top Slayer! Oh yes, people it's the start of level three, the sequence that's going to banish the spare tire for good!


Here it is straight up. The workout made me feel sick!

I will say that this sequence is at once as beautiful as it is painful. But if I thought I was lost on the arms in the last series, I don't stand an egg's chance under an elephant's foot of nailing this one. The arms are pure dance. (And I mean dance in a good way, an artsy way, not in a cardio way.) If anyone were watching me do this they'd be convinced that I was part of a Mime Freak du Soleil.

Same with the standing abs. Shamandment number 11 is most definitely in effect here! There's no way I can pull off anything remotely resembling grace while doing this, just no way. And can I ask where she comes up with these moves for the legs?! Just when I thought it was safe to come back to the mat. Another blogger, Marcia talked about fiery damnation in her legs. I have no idea if she was talking about this particular sequence.... but it applies! Forget the padded yoga mat that has Tracy neatly handwritten on the edges. I want the full pillow-top deluxe mattress with SHAN scrawled right through the middle okay? My old knees can't take it.

And I'm sorry but at one point during some particularly grueling leg lift, Tracy gleefully exclaims "Ten more of these." There may as well be an evil little laugh and an "off with their heads!" added on to that because you know the only thing worse than ten more leg lifts is death. Or actually, at this point death might just be a welcome relief.


As I approach this challenging new workout, it's not the only challenge I face. Diet is again a problem. I cannot freestyle. I screw it up every time. Every time and I am so frustrated. I don't want to write about it, don't want to hear about it, don't want to think about it, diet sucks! It sucks I tell you. I make bad choices.


My beloved cooked last night. He made Indian. My fave. (Do I sound like the dog here? A walk my favorite thing, a car ride my favorite thing!) It's not a bad food choice if you moderate portion sizes. The problem is, I had a little too much Sag Paneer - so the cheese is really rich, right? Then he made this lentil dish which rocked and how bad can lentils be? They are so not bad, they feed millions around the world everyday, most of whom have lovely trim physiques. But it was the enormous amount of rice I had piled onto my plate. I could have fed a family of ten in India I'm sure, not to mention the samosa. And what's the rule? Anyone?....


Carbs trigger sugar cravings. Have I learned nothing?! Nothing? I don't even want to talk about it, it will bore you to tears. Let's just say there was a bag of chocolate covered almonds involved and leave it at that.


A reader had asked me if I thought this diet was doable for a college student. I said sure! Why not? Of course it's doable. In theory!!! Communism is a good idea in theory! I just want to wail and kick and scream and stomp my feet, or as my dad would succinctly put it, throw a tantrum. Then once I pick myself up off the ground and dust myself off, I've got a lot of running to do to catch up with the wagon that I've apparently just taken a nose dive off of.


I am going to get busy today and whip up some choco-chestnut pudding, I don't give a damn if it's not on the diet for Body Reset week four, I need it. Am also going to throw together a batch of black bean brownies because black beans are on the frigging diet and there is nowhere on there that states I cannot have that half cup of black beans with cocoa and cinnamon. So there! 

I'll stick those babies in the freezer..... for when I overdo it on the bloody carbs. Somebody help me. Please. Where diet is concerned I am a total train wreck.


Listen, it's not a complete hate day. The cardio is over so that's good, right? I got it. I am back on. I hope today will be slightly less self-indulgent. Better luck to all of you.
xo
Shan

Twenty three meta days down!

Okay, so the title of this blog might be a bit of a misnomer. I have not mastered the method, nor will I ever likely master the method. It's only called that because my last name is really and truly Masters. How bout that?

So for anyone who might have been under the misconception or false impression that I know what I'm doing or have some secret direct line to Tracy, hate to break it to you, but you were mislead. I'm just fumbling my way through this like most everyone else. You see, today was day ten on level two for me. Which means that tomorrow I start all over again, like a newbie. And it means that I should have somewhat gotten the routine down. I mean, you'd think after doing it ten times in a row, it might even be second nature. Nope. No-siree. Those arm moves are way beyond me. I am still flailing around like a poor bird with a broken wing and the standing abs? It's actually quite hideous. 

Tracy looks like she's rocking out on the dance floor. Me? I look like I've just been jabbed with a taser. The drapes of the living room must remain closed at all times when practicing the method. Maybe that needs to become shamandment number 11, by golly. People don't really say by golly any more do they? I think I should bring that back.


It was also weigh-in and measurement day. I nearly forgot to do it. Or one might say I neglected to do it or even that I avoided doing it, but why get into semantics? 


I did learn something new as I was about to step on the scale. I have developed weigh-in-a-phobia. While it's true that I've never been a fan of having my weight taken, much less documented, I wasn't actually afraid of it until now. That's the thing about the stupid magic number and why I've sort of been against it. You've all been super gracious and complimentary in congratulating me on my progress and now having reached my goal weight, and I want to thank you. It means so much. I also hope that you'll share not only your challenges here but your victories too. But now I feel I need to warn you. Reaching that friggin' number ain't all it's cracked up to be. The reason I was afraid to step on the scale was because what if I'd gained some of the weight back? I certainly don't want to lose more but god forbid I gain it back, lordissa!!


You see I've never been in this position before. Once I hit my 30's and then got married, I gained the weight and never ever got it off. Those last six pounds or so seemed permanent. So you kinda learn to live with it. It's no biggie. You step on the scale and celebrate that the number's gone down a little, but there's always more to go, always more to lose, always a goal to strive for. And then you hit the number? Then what? I'm still thick-wasted. Still abcentric. If the only way to change that is to lose more weight, I'm not interested because it isn't realistic, I won't be able to maintain it after the program and I don't want to set myself up for failure. I am interested in a lifestyle change here.


Maybe the change has to come from the inside. So many beautiful and amazing women (present company included, yes that means you gorgeous readers) have struggled over the years with diets. We shrink and gain, shrink and gain but the image in our heads always seems to stay the same. I mean, I'm starting to think that the only way I am ever going to look like Kate is to photoshop my head onto her body. And what the hell, maybe that's enough? Shamandment number one is to be Shannon. As much as I want to I will never ever be Evangeline Lily, no matter how much I work out and no matter how much or how little I eat. But that's okay. I can be beautiful too in my own way. And so can you. The thing is, you already are.


Janet Jackson, of whom I am totally a huge fan of, always have been, has a new book out called True You: A Journey to Finding and Loving Yourself. It looks amazing and I totally want to read it. But I want to share something here with you from the introduction of her book. She says and I quote:


I want this book to make a difference. It's important that I present myself just as I am. So I must tell you right away that I am no expert. I have no psychic powers and I sure don't possess any secret wisdom.


I'm just Janet. I have strengths, weaknesses, fears, happiness and sadness. I experience joy and I experience pain. I'm highly emotional. I'm very vulnerable. And as anyone who knows me well will testify, I'm extremely sensitive. I've never gone into the hard work involved in getting myself, mind and spirit, heart and soul, into shape. I've waited for the right time and have decided that that time is now.
---------------


I feel like she is me. I could have said that. I'm highly emotional and very sensitive and believe it or not, a total introvert. I am a writer, remember. But I started this blog so that I could be accountable to myself but it's become so much more. I want this blog to make a difference too. Janet's struggled with her image and has struggled to love herself. So have many of us.


What I am trying to say is that if we don't have a grip on how truly great we all already are, it doesn't matter what Tracy can help us do for ourselves, it won't mean a thing. Sorry, I went off a little bit there. But I just don't want us to put so much pressure on ourselves to be perfect. There are a lot of readers out there who are just starting the program or who are contemplating starting and are intimidated by the diet or how much we've got to work out. If you've read this blog at all you know how easy it is to slip up. Many people on the forum have tripped up and fallen off the wagon and totally beat themselves up for it.


I say forget about it. No being hateful meanies to ourselves allowed, shamandment number 7! We are doing something really good for ourselves here. Lets be proud.


Finally here's the scoop on the progress made in the last ten days. A few days ago I hit my goal weight and today I am still there. Coolio. (also a huge fan of really dated sayings apparently) I have lost two inches in total.... but nothing off my waist. Grrrrr. An inch off my chest, drat, an inch off my hips and half an inch off of both my lower waist (across the hipbones) and  from each thigh. Great, now I just look like a marshmallow on toothpicks!


Tomorrow we're going to up our game and jump into level three. So for those of you just starting out, take heart, I'll be struggling to keep up right along with you.


Hugs
Shan

Day twenty-two Metamorphosis

Um...hey y'all. Has anybody really done the math on this program? What I mean to say is, has anybody calculated the actual number of days? Go ahead and grab your workout tracker. Fourteen whole freaking days away from the end, there's a little star - like around eight days into workout eight - that's workout EIGHT people!!! that says *Day 90. And it's all like yeah!! You've reached 90 days and nah nah nah nah nah, you have two more weeks to go and a whole 'nother workout.

So like.... you know all that stuff I said about Bear Grylls yesterday. Forget Bear, dude had it easy, we're still gonna be on freakin' Everest when he's was already home soaking in a hot tub with I dunno, probably a glass of champagne and a chocolate fudge brownie having his feet massaged. Bastard! I'm just kidding. Mostly. 

Alright, I just had to get that outta the way. So where are we? How's everybody doing? Surviving? Yesterday wrapped up week three for me and it was a nutrient boost week. For those who don't know, I messed up a lil'bit when I did my grocery shopping and I got food for the whole week for nutrient boost... week one. Duh, is anyone starting to get the idea that I do not have a good eye for detail? No matter. I sucked it up and had another week of sweet potato corn pudding and parsnip puree, but I am happy to say that I am looking through the rear-view mirror at that mush and it's eating my dust. I am speeding away so fast that I'd make Mario Andretti proud.

But now I'm not quite sure what to do. I've hit my goal weight. It's not quite as glorious as it sounds. I guess that's because when you hold a magic number in your head, you automatically think that life is gonna be so much better when you get there. We're here! you call out to yourself, but life just kinda looks the same. The picture of myself that I keep in my head still looks the same, but while my head needs some time to catch up with the rest of me - two things have to happen. The first is that I have to understand that my body shape is my body shape no matter how big or small. Despite what Tracy may say about defying genetics - and you can challenge me on this, I may even eat these words in 90 days and two weeks - but I will always be straight up and down. I will never be an hourglass, never have a Jay Lo butt, and more than likely will never look like Kate (Evangeline Lily).

And two, I have to make some changes to the Dynamic eating plan so that I don't lose anymore weight. I'm not worried about a pound or two here and there, but I don't want to lose, say five more pounds or anything. I have no desire to be a stick figure and I am not a thirteen year old boy. Besides, women of a certain age should have a wee bit of meat on their bones otherwise being too thin just ages you - Heidi Klum will back me up on this, I got it from her. I mean think about it - look at  - what's that really skinny Spice girl who is married to the soccer (football) star. Is it Posh? She looks at bit harsh. Same with Lara Flynn Boyle. I am not knocking naturally thin women at all, but some of these girls just look severe and that's not what I am after.

That said, I have no idea what to do diet wise because food has always been my weakness and therefore my down fall. I'll have to play it by ear and keep you posted. I am definitely having coffee this week, in fact there's a cup with me here at my desk. Sorry 'bout that.

As for cardio, I am also making some changes there too - (insert GASP here) No don't worry I am not bailing on the cardio. My plan from today forward is to switch to more days on the rebounder and less days "regular on the floor dancing" instead of the reverse. It's just better for me on my little trampoline. It's tolerable and the less negative energy I feel while on the program the better. It really is harder to convince yourself day after day to do things you genuinely don't like doing, so why swim against the current? Working out has never been easy for most of us, so let's give ourselves the best chance of success, whatever that may be. And for me, it's my rebounder.

I want to provide a gentle reminder here that I'm not an expert on Tracy or the method or Metamorphosis, so this blog isn't meant to be giving you advice on what to do - it's more to share the hell I am going through while hopefully sharing a laugh or two along the way as well.

So lemme share a little Ghosts of Cardio Past story with you here. 

I used to live in Toronto and I have a friend there who I've mentioned on this blog once before. She's tall, glamorous and gorgeous and she's got her thumb on all things urban and trendy. So one day she's says to me that she's been doing this great new workout called spinning and she'd like me to come along. Oh no, I say, I get really dizzy and have severe motion sickness, spinning would not be for me. You can just imagine how my ultra-cool urban hipster friend was looking at me, like I was a complete alien. How could I be living in downtown Toronto and not have heard of spinning? Was I living under a rock? But she is as patient as she is beautiful, so she explained to me that spinning was actually exercise on a stationary bike. 

Well where's the fun in that? I thought, but I had no valid excuse not to go so I went along. Here's where some background on me might be helpful. Hate to sweat, but you know that already. Hate cardio, you know that too. What you may not know is that I am mixed Cree Canadian. Loosely translated that means that I am Native American from Canada with some white relatives and I am originally from Saskatchewan. I am not gonna speak for all Indians, but I will say this. In my family, not huge fans of bike riding and growing up on the plains, you don't see many hills.

So knowing this, you can guess how well I did in spinning class. We start out with no tension on our bikes and our feet are flying on the pedals and I'm thinking that I'm pretty good at this. The music's okay, the club is kinda swanky, hell I could do this all day! Maybe I've found the thing that will get me in super star shape. Yesss! I'm spinning and spinning. But then the instructor - who is waaaaay too peppy for my liking tells us to crank the nob thingy and turn up the tension. Not just a little bit, but all the way. I do this, but realize that it's really f@#*ing hard now. Fun's gone. She says, get your butt out of the seat and imagine that you are biking up a really steep hill. What?!! As if?

No way lady. If I'm on my bike (which I'd only be because my car broke down) and I see a hill? I'm getting off and walking it up the hill.

Defiant. Defiant. Defiant!

Well! By the looks on everyone's faces as they've got their sweaty buttocks in the air and they're all red faced and grunting - to watch me walking in place beside my bike was... you can imagine it. But was kicking me out of class really necessary?

Okay, that last part never really happened, except for in my head, and I only pretended to crank up the tension all the way because I'm not insane.. but the point is... I'm not exactly a role model that you should be fashioning your fitness habits after if you catch my drift. Needless to say I never did go back to spinning class. But I love love love the Tracy Anderson Method, so if you're brave or just bored at work, you can come here and hang with me anytime and we'll dish the dirt on Meta, boot camp, dieting and getting fit.

Cheers,
Shan

Three weeks into Meta - Eleven to go

Happy first day of spring, my peeps. Or was that yesterday? Who cares, we're officially into spring and I think spring fever is beginning to kick in. It's my rest day today and I inadvertently ended up on a 6km hike.

Lemme tell you something, I've done that hike before but it was actually easier today. Oh I was still huffing and puffing up those steep hills but my recovery time was so much quicker and it was way easier getting up and down the hills carrying sixteen pounds less. Wow, who knew?

I will admit that last week, I had a pretty strong hate day, I was more cat than dog and basically I was feeling a wee bit overwhelmed with the whole program. But it's all about perspective. As a wise native woman once said, the same sun that melts butter can also harden clay. Last week I was like - there is no way I can keep this sh!t up for another eleven weeks - for another seventy-whatever days. Just no way. And while it is a rest day today and I am not an eager little beaver wanting to get all up in my sneakers tomorrow - I can sit back and look at it like this. I have eleven more weeks to get it right.

You know, we all have good days and bad days, days where it's easier, the workout flies by, the food satisfies and we can see a shift in our bodies, and then there are the bad days. Days where the aging body aches, the dimply skin persists, PMS kicks in and we just want cake. I am not going to advocate for having cake necessarily, although I have been known to nip into Starbucks for an oat fudge bar on occasion, I will say this. If you fall off the wagon, so what? What good is it going to do you to sit there in the dirt. Get your ass back up, chase that wagon down and grab hold of that baby with both hands. You can get back on. One bad day does not negate all the hard work we're doing here, got it?

So let's talk about perspective. I must preface this by saying that I'm the first person to argue that it's all relative, okay? But let's ignore that for the moment.

I want to talk about Bear Grylls. Anybody know him? He's a reality tv guy on a show called Man vs Wild. He was a British Special Forces dude who now does a show that demonstrates extreme situations that will help you survive, should you ever be lost in the wild. 
Check him out, he's pretty awesome.
http://www.beargrylls.com/ 

So what does a British army guy have to do with the Tracy Anderson Method, you ask? No, I am not going to compare her to a drill sergeant, although she is a real badass in her own right, I want to talk about him a little bit because he's a real inspiration and I think he can help us get through this.

Here's how. Bear is a Guinness Book of Records holder for being the youngest Briton to climb Mount Everest. So? you may be asking. He did it just 18 months after breaking his back. Yeah, And? Let's draw a few parallels, shall we? We are working toward the summit of our own goal, which is to have bodies that we really love, bodies that are both functional and beautiful, so lets say that our idea of perfection is our Everest. Guess how long it took him to climb that bad boy?

Ding ding ding, if you guessed 90 days, you'd be right. So here we are, on a 90 day program put together by Badass Anderson. We might whine and complain that our rations suck, that the workout's way too hard. But anytime we like, we can shut off that DVD. We can have an extra helping of parsnip puree if we so choose - but dude was up there in the most extreme weather conditions, sometimes without even enough air to breathe, eating freeze-dried rations for the same 90 days we're doing this. Almost makes our journey seem cushy no?  He didn't have the option of just walking away and we shouldn't give ourselves that option either.

Why not look at this as our climb up Everest. We might not break any records, but we're damn sure not going to watch four of our friends die trying to do this. Remember though, just while we're drawing parallels, that Bear didn't do it alone. He had a team, one member of which actually saved his life on that trip. We have a team too. We've got each other, we've got this place and the Tracy Anderson forum where we can get together around the proverbial camp fire and swap war stories and compare battle scars.

Plus we get to sleep in our own beds at night. From that point alone, we're not that bad off after all. Kinda makes the Metamorphosis seem almost doable, no?

Cheers
Shan

19 Days. Abcentric. Photos.

Not entirely a caterpillar, not quite a butterfly. Perhaps I am a moth. Ha. I can live with that.

I wish that I could enter into this post with an air of confident detachment, but who am I kidding. I'm terrified!

Ah picture day. Who among us remembers those days from grade school? And who actually got excited about picture day? Kids who grew up to be actors and models and news anchors, that's who! But not writers. Writers write and we do it behind the scenes. We like to be kept out of the spot light. Damn why did I have to flog a blog about bloody fitness for crying out loud?!

I never liked picture day. Maybe it's because I've never been the most photogenic. Not like my sister, the girl can't take a bad photo. She got the height and the long legs too. But I got the brains - he he he. (I have no doubt she's going to have all sorts to say about that!)

Or maybe I dreaded picture day because my mother always wanted to "do" my hair and it would get styled into some ungodly and totally unnatural style that was nowhere near a representation of who I was on an everyday basis. Love you mom! Then there was the outfit. It was stiff or scratchy. Dress up clothes. Again, not the stuff you'd where everyday. Don't feel bad moms around the world. You all do it. Think of Ellen Degeneres in all her prom day glory. I suppose it happens to the best of us. Although, come to think of it, her mother probably didn't dress her that day. Ellen!! What were you thinking, woman?

Perhaps it was because of picture day that I became a writer and work predominantly from home where I can wear my jim-jams or baggy old sweats. But I guess I can't get away with those in today's pictures, can I?

Quiz for you. What's worse? Going through a metamorphosis at the hands of Baddass Anderson or having my photo taken in form-fitting clothing? I'll make it easy for you, neither one's a picnic. 

I just want to say, I'm doing this for you Alma! And Raylene. And for anyone else out there who thinks that it isn't working or that they can't do it. In the immortal words of our trainer, quoted from her Mat Video, "You really can and you really must." Of course she's referring to holding your arms out for the entire arm sequence, but I think it applies just as well to the Metamorphosis program and the 30 Day Method. I do wonder if she's ever done her nutrient boost week though. Never mind all that. Let's just get on with it shall we? Or have you already scrolled straight to the bottom and are reading this after having already seen the photos. Shame on you!!

If by some miracle you are reading before seeing the pictures, I want to forewarn you that I don't like having my photo taken. Oh, did I mention that already? When I'm nervous I get repeaty. Repeaty. I like it even less when I'm chubby as you'll see from the expression on my face. But in order for you to see how far Tracy's helped me come, I suppose you'll need to see where I've been. Hence the lovely before snaps. And please keep in mind that I am not even three weeks into the Metamorphosis program, however, I did go through boot camp just prior, so I'd say these results are from nearly 7 weeks on the wagon. (Erm - more or less - But I guess you know that since I've made several very public confessions about what a total slacker I can be!)

Without further adieu, here they are. Hope this helps somebody out there somewhere. 

 

 Apparently being chubby makes me cry?!

Why did I think that dress was a good idea? Good lord. Sorry Yan, hope it didn't spoil the wedding photos. Those are actually tears of joy.


(The following photos are shot in the mirror, which will explain why my tattoo appears to be on the opposite arm. Do you have any idea how difficult it is to photograph yourself? Don't try this at home!)

My Butt is starting to perk up.

The muffin top is diminishing.

Thighs are thinner & check out the pipes!

At the end of Boot camp.

Nearly 3 weeks on Abcentric

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

For anyone who is Abcentric and thinks that there is no such thing as a program that can actually deliver on it's promise to whittle your middle because you've tried them all and they have all failed.... think again, ladies.

It's really coming along. Imagine 71 days from now?

I'm an ordinary woman. A screenwriter who sits at her computer all day long in the middle of nowhere who, until I found the Method, sat around eating cookies and brownies feeling sorry for myself because I'd let myself get old without ever having gotten my six-pack. (and who is apparently a fan of the run-on sentence)

Not even three weeks into my Abcentric Metamorphosis and my shape might actually be starting to change.

So there it is. In cyber space forever. What the hell, I'm turning 40 this year so who gives a rat's ass, right? My buddy Rachel from the UK would say, DARN RIGHT!


Cheers and have a great weekend all. I'm off for Greasy Chinese Takeaway. Just kidding!!

Shan

Day Eighteen. Metamorphosis.

I really wanted today to be this uplifting inspirational post, because that's how I felt last night. Yeah, that was last night. Sorry girls. I woke up this morning and thought, good God! I want to play a new game. I was hungry. I hate waking up hungry. Especially since yesterday I wasn't a saint. I had two choco-chestnut puddings, count em, two! And a coffee, oh yessiree I did so. And some eggs. Screw it! I figured if the meat eaters get beef and chicken this week, shouldn't I be allowed eggs? After all, where the hell do you think the chicken comes from? 

Defiant defiant defiant.

I remind myself of a cat. Have you ever heard of the Dog's Diary vs the Cat's Diary? That's exactly how I feel today.

The dog's like: 8am, Dog food, my favorite thing!
9:30am, A car ride, my favorite thing!
9:40am, A walk in the park, my favorite thing! 
10:30am, Got rubbed and petted, my favorite thing!

While the cat's like: Day 983 of my captivity. My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meats while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the ration perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength. The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape.


Me, exactly. 

Day 18 of my captivity. While my captor remains nowhere in sight, I know that her honey sweet voice and petite stature are a mere facade. How could they be otherwise, when she forces me to eat this.... this .... what I can only call gruel while she makes me bend and twist my limbs in all sorts of hideously unnatural positions over and over again, followed by horribly long sessions of jumping around repeatedly until my legs and feet can barely support my dwindling weight. The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape.

Yet, last night I was thinking, Ooooh the Tracy Anderson Method, my favorite thing! Metamorphosis, my favorite thing! Choco-chestnut pudding, my favorite thing! Cardio, my.... I can't even type the words because you all know that that would be a bold faced lie! 

Here's one good thing I can say about cardio though - the best thing about cardio is that eventually it comes to an end! What do you say to that BA? That's short for Baddass Anderson, the new moniker for my captor.

Seriously though, I am teetering dangerously close to slipping off the metamorphosis wagon, so because a couple of you have requested pics of my mid-morph body, I'll see if I can take a couple and post them tomorrow. Just in case I do make a break for my freedom and some French Fries!!
PS
I'm not on Facebook or anything, so if you enjoy reading about my pain and suffering, tell your friends. You can all laugh at me together.


Cheers
Shan

Seventeen Days into my Metamorphosis

Happy St. Patrick's Day everyone! I love St. Paddy's day, it's one of my favorite days of the year, but somehow I think this year's not gonna be quite the same.

No Guinness, no Bailey's, none of that for us tonight girls. The only green thing in our future is Kale Juice. Oh joy. Do I sound like a bit of a grump? That's because I am a bit of a grump. Not a love day people. The supermarket in my neighborhood makes these delicious little vanilla cupcakes piled with miles of Shamrocky green icing. How the heck do you insert a sad face here? Darn it I wish I was more tech savvy! 

And just before coming here, I spent the longest half hour of my life doing cardio. Will I never love it?! Okay, dangerously close to slipping into really whiny territory and since there's no cheese to go with that whine - I'll stop.

Seventeen days down, seventy-three more to go, not including rest days. Whoops, whining again. Okay, best not to think about it, rather take it one day at a time. And I happen to be on a day that includes a variety of chopped, diced, and squashed up foods of varying colors, flavors and consistencies. I actually don't mind it once it's all whipped into being, but getting to that stage is not exactly a picnic.


I thought it rather prudent to write about because lately there's been a lot of talk about the Baddass Anderson diet (my new name for her in case you aren't all caught up). Readers want to know if other people are following the diet, how they are doing it so that they're not having to move a cot into the kitchen and take up residence there permanently, what vegetarians are eating, if having the puree is necessary and the like. One comment that really got me laughing was about the Nutrient Boost week, and I quote:


I spent some major time in the kitchen prepping all my food for the week, and it's 6:30p.m. and I still have 1/2 of my gazpacho, 1/2 apple/bb sauce, 1/2 pudding and a whole serving of soup. I never thought that it was going to be too much food!

-----------

And it's absolutely the case. It's is quite a lot of food and sometimes fitting it all in can be a challenge. Those of you worried about having to spend a lot of time cooking, put in one hard core day prepping everything and you're pretty much off the hook the whole rest of the week. Get a bigger food processor to spend even less time. I have one of those three cup jobbies and they take forever!


Worried about getting bored with the selection? Don't be. You have seven choices to pick from. On an average day how often is that the case? Almost never. You can have them however and whenever you want them. Not quite sure what to do because maybe you've never done anything even remotely close to this? Here's what TA has to say about it in her book.


We all have different cravings and styles of eating. I want you to feel satisfied, so I've identified a few common eating types. Remember, as long as you eat the seven prescribed foods in a day, you are doing it correctly.
1)The Nibbler. Some of us don't care if we never sit down to a meal. A handful of this and that every now and again, and we're satisfied We'd rather be nibbling all day than loading up at mealtimes.
For these people, Tracy suggests that you divide your portions so that you are nibbling on 2 ounces of food or green juice every hour.
2)The Grazer. Not quite a Nibbler that subsists on snacking, not quite someone who needs a full breakfast lunch and dinner, Grazers enjoy light meals throughout the day.
The idea for these people is to eat 4 ounces of food every two hours.
3) The Three Square. Even if they're giving up mashed potatoes and gravy for the time being, these eaters are happiest sitting down to three full meals daily with a range of tastes and textures.
And for folks like me who don't feel like constantly snacking. Even when we're watching what we eat we still want to sit at the table with everyone else, we can enjoy full meals with soup and dessert and not blow all our hard work.


It makes sense. Just because we're eating foods prepped in a way that haven't been on our plate since the age of 12 months, doesn't mean we have to change who we are or how we like to nourish ourselves.


Now someone asked if we've got to puree everything. Why not just have an apple instead for example. I'm not a dietitian and I don't know Tracy personally so haven't asked her but here are my two cents. Oh you know I have an opinion!


Having lived in a yoga ashram on a few separate occasions, part of the lifestyle includes juicing and a once weekly fast (both optional). The reason that yogis take a fast or do a juice cleanse is to give the digestive system a break. This is healthy and good for this hard working body system. It also gives the body a chance to take some of that energy and use it on healing itself. Plus juicing is an excellent way to receive nutrients swiftly.


That's not exactly the case here, but it plays a role. And if Tracy simply wanted us to lose weight and get a nutritional boost, why not have us go on a juice fast? Good question. Here's what I think. Please do keep in mind that I am not backing this up with science or anything. I'm just going on my own personal experience and as we've already established - me - no expert. 


When food's pureed, you can bypass some of the work that your digestive system normally has to do while still getting all that good fiber that's found in those whole foods she's prescribed. With less impact on digestion, you can go straight to absorbing all the nutrients. This way, you don't have to wait quite as long for the energy from the food, which is good because we are working out pretty hard and we need that extra energy quickly. Also, by pureeing the food rather than juicing it, we do keep the fiber which slows down the absorption of sugar into the blood stream so we don't get a sugar high and then crash afterward. Plus who among us can subsist on juice alone for seven days at a stretch? That would just be setting up the majority of us for failure.


With that said, I will admit that I still like to keep my gazpacho crunchy. Having all those nice cucumbers and juicy tomatoes with onions and crunchy peppers keeps me from sneaking in other foods that are not on the menu. Like my St. Patrick's day cupcakes! Besides that combo of veggies is just too nice as a salad to not let it be that.


And lastly, I wondered what our diet might look like at the end of this Metamorphosis journey, or even in the middle of it once we've achieved our goal weights, so I asked the good people at Tracy Anderson Method. com and here's the response that came. 


Tracy suggests that you make food alterations as you see fit in your life. (um yeah, because that's worked so far) Of course is not realistic to stick to such a firm diet plan, but you can use parts of the plan to help shape your future diet.  You will find that the Metamorphosis program will help you stick to your goals and make smart decisions, even after you are done with the program.


While not terribly enlightening, at least they didn't ignore the question. After all there are over twelve thousand of us now on the program so they've got to be fielding a ton of queries.


I've never been one to manage my food intake well. I suppose that's why I like the baby food week so much. (I'm using the term like very loosely here) There is nothing on the list of foods that I have an aversion to (and I am horribly picky) and we're told exactly how much we can have. There's no math, no decisions, nothing. It's easy. Once the program is over and I'm out there free-styling, I may run into some trouble. After I finished boot camp the first time, I eased back into "normal" eating by adding rice at dinner or toast with my egg whites in the morning, but within a few days I was back to eating brownies with my granola. Seriously. Lesson not learned. So I am a little nervous about going it alone.


Anyone with tips or advice, I welcome your thoughts and suggestions. In the mean time, I am off to enjoy my blueberry apple sauce.

Cheers and may the luck of the Irish be with you!
Shan

Metamorphosis Days Fifteen and Sixteen

I am going to boldly toot my own horn here and say that in the 16 days I've been doing Meta so far, I have only missed two days of cardio. Now before you think what a blowhard, or brag much? or wow that's discipline or that I have crazy will power, think again.


I have honestly just gotten sick and tired of being unhappy in my own skin. That unhappiness had finally tipped the scales to the point that something drastic had to be done. And now that I am finally seeing results, I'll be damned if I am going to stop. However -


I was struck by a wee flu bug on Monday afternoon. It seems to have let up today so hopefully it was just a 24 hour thing.

I did manage to get through the muscular structure yesterday but there wasn't enough left in the energy reserves to get through the cardio. Can you even believe that I felt bad about it, like that I actually kind of wanted to do it? I know, right? Totally weird. I must be unwell. I didn't even feel secretly happy that I couldn't do it. 


But lemme tell you what kind of workout I did get in the interim. I spent over two and a half hours in the kitchen yesterday. Hey, listen. I don't want to scare anyone off these Nutrient Boost weeks. I don't. 

But by the time I was through, my legs were sore from standing for so long! No kidding. Not only that, my cheap little mini-food-processor was over-heating and I swear I could smell it burning. Shoulda busted out the extra few bucks for the big one. Anyway, it's done.

Here's the interesting thing about all that work. At the 2 hour mark, I was starting to get a little annoyed. I was thinking I've had about enough of this as I was shoving the last of the sweet potato and corn into the thingie to smoosh it up. (Yeah yeah, I know there isn't sweet potato corn pudding on the Nutrient Boost this week, screw up at the market, remember?) But then I started thinking about how I spend my time and what I consider all day. The sound track in my head went something like this.... I've been in here steaming, boiling, measuring and pureeing all bloody day, is there no end?! Yet I can sit down to watch a movie for two hours and that's not all day. I might watch some TV with dinner and think to myself, gee, I haven't had any down time today. It's crazy what we can condition ourselves to believe. I've even been prone to thinking that life without cookies is no life at all, and yet I've been surprisingly satisfied with my choco-chestnut pudding. Isn't that pudding the best?

It's all about reframing how we think. This is too hard or this takes up too much time might be true some days but on an average day you've got to ask yourself: "too much compared to what? Eating cheetos in front of the TV?"


When you come to a point in your life that some refer to as a mid-life crisis, you start to ask yourself some hard questions. Questions like "what if everything I've been doing my whole adult life has prepared me for a life that will never exist?" Or "what if these dreams I've been harboring for my future are so beyond my reach that my now is the future and it looks nothing like what I thought it would?" Hard questions. And they don't just apply to your health or the shape you're in, they can apply to your chosen field of work, to your marriage or the lack there of, to the family you have or don't or wish you did. That's why they call it a crisis, because you start to suddenly question everything about yourself.

I cannot speak for you, nor do I claim to be the voice of every 40 year old woman, I can only share my experiences, but this much I know is true.

About two years ago, I gave up that dream of ever looking fantastic. Oh don't get me wrong, I continued to fight and workout and "detox" and try new programs, but secretly inside, I felt like I was fighting a losing battle. I'm here to tell you, flu and all, that the dream is once again alive. Oh nothing as grandiose as becoming a Victoria's Secret Model, although now that Ms. Klum has given up the thrown...... hmm. KIDDING!!! I think the wings would dwarf my now-oh-so delicate frame. (Besides, you gotta have something up front to balance those babies out, and that's one area where the inches continue to come off. Ugh) I digress. My point is, is that the changes I am now seeing in my physical self are ones I thought long impossible.

First of all, there was nothing ever in the past that would get me out of my sick bed to exercise, yet there I was, nauseous and head-achey on the mat doing my leg lifts and working my abs. And today I am proud to say that yes, I have done both my muscular structure AND my cardio. And I have actually really come to love Tracy. I love listening to her upbeat voice -  "things are going to get a little bit faster now that you're getting better at this," I almost want to talk back to the TV and ask, you really think I'm getting better? 

Okay, maybe I did ask, but I'd argue in a court of law that it was fever induced delirium. 

I know I complain about the workouts being so hard and that every joint south of my neck aches just thinking about dancing, but I've grown very fond of this method. It's part of my life and as such I've got to make it my own. It's just how I roll, so I've renamed our fearless leader. Cheeky cow! No I haven't renamed Tracy cheeky cow, I was saying that that's what I was, patience patience.


I think she should be called Baddass Anderson. What do you think? Too much Nyquil? You gotta admit, she is a little bit  baddass right?

And her whole thing is that she reshapes behinds, so she quite literally takes a bad ass and makes it baddass.

Oh lordissa, I'm not as well as I thought I was. I sound entirely mad. In any case, I'd like to say that I am grateful to Tracy Anderson and her Method for easing my midlife crisis just a little bit by giving me one dream back. 

More than that though, I hear so many others say how grateful they are for what she's done for them, if Tracy were reading this, I'd want to tell her how grateful I am for what she's helped me to do for myself. (feed a man a fish, teach a man to fish, you know the saying) I'm taking my body back from the ravages of bad eating habits and the wrong kinds of exercise or sheer dumb-ass laziness and lame excuses and with her guidance, I'm redesigning my shape into something I can be proud to wear everyday.

To those of you on the fence, those in the midst of your own crisis, or those just fed up or bored with your current routine I want to tell you to give her a shot and just see if she doesn't make your dreams come true too.


As for the rest of you who are pushing through this with me, you are such an inspiration to me. But I've gotta ask, what are you still doing here?! Get your badasses back on the mat!

Cheers,
Shan